The Recovered Life Show

Gabri Augello (00:00):
Oh, my gosh, if I've been sober long enough, you know, am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing? Can I actually, you know, handle this job? And I think that that can be translated in any job or career. You know, you are, anything that you know is working full-time even halftime. Sobriety is a full-time job. So it's like you have a full-time job. You, you know, sticking to your sobriety, then you have to add on this other layer, sometimes their kind of is this thought, like, can I handle all of this?

Announcer (00:30):
You're listening to the recovered life show the show that helps people in recovery live their best-recovered lives. And here is your host Damon, Frank,

Damon Frank (00:41):
Welcome back to the recovered life show. I'm pleased to have on again to the show, Gabri Augello who is a recovering out loud, social media influencer. How are you doing Gabri?

Gabri Augello (00:54):
I'm great. It's good to see you again.

Damon Frank (00:56):
I am so thrilled that you're back on the show. You know, I always love having you because you have such great energy and we always have a lot of fun when we, when we do the show together and this topic is really cool because I've had a lot of people ask me about this. A lot of people at early recovery, talk about getting their first job sober. Right. And there's a lot of dread and feelings, and oh, is it, how's it going to be different? And is it really it gonna work out? And you just went through that. So I can't wait to have this discussion with you.

Gabri Augello (01:29):
Yeah. So, you know, besides the whole sober part, I just got my first like real adult job. So it was that on top of like my first sober job. So yeah, it's definitely been, you know, a whirlwind. I would say like, you know, not just, you know, the job itself, I feel like a lot of people that, you know, are struggling with this in their past jobs. Like their coworkers knew them as like, oh, they're the fun one. They're the partier; they're this that I know for me, like in my past jobs, my coworkers knew they were like, she's the drinker, she's the partier. And so I was nervous going into, you know, this job with like a clean slate and it was all this pressure where it's like, okay, I need to establish myself as this, you know, healthy, sober individual. And, you know, I have to always make the healthiest choice, and I need to put my best foot forward always. And so I feel like a lot of times we, we set a little bit too high expectations for ourselves. But yeah, so that was definitely, you know, something I struggled with a little

Damon Frank (02:29):
Bit, and I know many people really struggle with, do I tell people in the workforce that I'm sober? Do I not? You know, obviously, it's probably, you know, right upfront, unless it's part of the job, you're not really necessarily communicating that because it might not be appropriate. Right. But did you have a little bit of dread because I know people at dread it's like, oh, am I gonna be found out as the non-drinker?

Gabri Augello (02:53):
Yeah. I think in my situation, it's a little bit different because my job is in addiction services. And I kind of had the belief that I don't think that people get into addiction services by accident. So yeah, I was open with my coworkers, you know, within reason and boundaries. And I think the advice I would give somebody is to, you know, feel it out. You don't owe anybody that inform them. If you think it's going to, you know, help you, if you feel that your coworkers are people that you can lean on, you know, on the type of job that I'm in, as, you know, a case manager you have to lean on your fellow case managers. And so for me, I was like, this is, you know, what's the best thing for me to do. So yeah, was really open, and I was nervous for some reason at first, I'm like, I'm going to be the only sober one, and that was not the case. And so that was really like, oh, wow. Like there are other people that, you know, are, you know, going along this journey with me. So that was definitely, you know, very beneficial.

Damon Frank (03:57):
So the anticipation of the feeling of what might happen and what people might think really was the thing that caused the most anxiety it looks like.

Gabri Augello (04:05):
Yeah, absolutely. And also too, just the buildup of, you know, the job itself. Like I said, like in my job, you know, I, I deal with clients that, you know, are struggling with their own substance abuse. And so there is that post syndrome. It's like, oh my gosh, have I been sober long enough? You know, am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing? Can I actually, you know, handle this job? And I think that that can be translated in any job or career. Anything that, you know, you are, are working full-time even halftime sobriety is a full-time job. So it's like you have a full, a time job, you know, sticking to your sobriety, then you have to add on this other layer, sometimes their kind of is this thought, like, can I handle all of this? Like, this is a lot of, you know, a lot of effort.

Gabri Augello (04:52):
And so I think that that really, like, I was so nervous about being able, you know, to do that. And I found that working full time at my job, it wasn't sustainable. And, and me realizing that like I beat myself up, but now looking back, I'm like, that's okay. Like that is absolutely okay. And I think that people it's better to realize that about yourself. Like I switched from full-time to per diem, and I'm still doing my job. I'm still helping my clients, but I'm also giving myself time to, you know, work my program and work my own sobriety.

Damon Frank (05:29):
And I think society has changed a lot. We were chatting about that earlier, you know, mm-hmm, back when I got sober, you know, they, they, you just were not, you know, and they and they told you, like, if you were in a 12 step program, it's I, that's something that you don't really share with people upfront. Right. And people are so much more accepting, and I think they understand, you know, how hard it is for people to get and stay sober. Right. And so people are much more excited, and kind of applaud that. And, and I've also found, you know, in the workforce and just by doing business that sometimes people sometimes trust you more if you have sobriety because you have that level of honesty. But I guess it's also what you just said is the boundary issue. It's like, don't, you re you really, did you feel, and that you had to kind of wade through and find out who you felt comfortable sharing that information?

Gabri Augello (06:23):
Most definitely. As I said, boundaries in any area of sobriety are just so important. As I said, I only, you know, shared with, you know, my fellow case managers, not everybody else, you know, at my job because, you know, I felt that it was, you know, a safe environment to do so. Also, with my clients, like I said, without crossing any ethical boundaries or anything you know, I did tell them that I am in my own, you know, recovery journey. And so that was something that was like, should I do that? Should I not do that? But in the end, kind of, as you said, it's like, you know, some of the clients were like, well, how, why am I going to listen to, you know, you, you have no life experience, and you don't know what it's like. So, you know, I'm like, well, you know, I, I, I don't know what it's like for you, but I do have this lived experience. And so, I think it does help you be able to connect to others. I said, not just in the field I'm in. But I think because you've had to look so introspectively within yourself that you are more in tune with emotion in general. And I think it helps you in the workplace for

Damon Frank (07:43):
Sure. And I think people that are listening to this probably, you know, Googled it or they found it or there, you know, their regular listener of the show. And they've either gone through this or they're about ready to go through it, right. That transition into the workplace. How is it different? The coming into a job, having some, you know, having sobriety and doing the deal and, you know, having your program and everything, as opposed to when you went into jobs when you weren't doing that, how, how has the experience been different for you as a sober person?

Gabri Augello (08:15):
Yeah, I felt like now I have way more of like a, a clear head. I mean, I obviously I felt like this is like the first job that I've really actually been able to use all of my, you know, talents and everything I learned in school and things like that to be able to fully fulfill my job. I feel like when, you know, I was drinking, I was not performing, you know, the way I should have been performing. It was my, my only thought always was, you know, after work, how am I gonna, you know, get this drink? Like I was so tunnel-visioned on that, that once, you know, that was eliminated, I was like, wow, I am capable. Like I actually can do this. And so it was a real, you know, confidence booster when I did get to my job and I saw those victories and, you know, my focus was on the job instead of, you know, all these other factors. It, it helped,

Damon Frank (09:15):
You know, I think when, when I'm just thinking back from what you were talking, like, a lot of people have expressed to me, and I know I have this thought in early sobriety was, I'm never going to be able to go to the company Christmas party. I'm going to be outed. I'm going to be the person that doesn't drink. There was so much dread. And then eventually, you know, sober, going to several old companies, Christmas parties and having my own, you know, company, Christmas parties, how little it actually mattered at the end of the day. There was maybe a toast once or somebody had a drink or something. It's almost a nonstarter. And it's funny about how much we can build up in sobriety. Mm-Hmm with really, you know, doing the deal and, and doing the work still build up in our head, this false sense of reality about what people might be thinking about us not drinking.

Gabri Augello (10:07):
Right. Yeah. I feel like we're always deep down are going to have a little bit of insecurity about it. I think, you know, that's kind of why we drank in the first place. We felt we needed that, you know, we needed that drink to be fun, to be social, to be a better person. And so when we take that away, even when we are doing the work, I feel like sometimes it, that insecurity can kind of still slip through the cracks. And yeah, that's, that's definitely a, a very valid thing that I think a lot of people go through. But just knowing that, you know, it's, it's not like a one-off thing. Like everybody goes through it sometimes makes people, you know, feel better about it. Yeah.

Damon Frank (10:49):
And I think there are several, you know, career paths too. Like, you know, I know a lot of people that were in the hospitality business are in the, you know, restaurant and bar business and they were in work situations that were not they were not friendly to sober people. They, they did not want people there that were sober. They wanted people there that drank. Right. Right. And because it was the culture of, of, of that business. And I think it's okay to also understand, that, like, I mean, wouldn't you say, like when you go in and your interview, if you get a sense kind of it's like, this is a place that's gonna be much more accepting to this or this isn't. And maybe if it isn't, you have to put your recovery first, and that's someplace that you don't want to pursue, that, that that's a job that might not be right for you long term.

Gabri Augello (11:33):
Absolutely. I mean, that is exactly why I, to the field that I'm in, in addiction services, because I was like, you know, what's what better way to, you know, keep sobriety at the forefront. And I also, too, was passionate about, you know, helping others and things like that, but absolutely like your sobriety is your full-time job always. And so that has to come first. And I know for a lot of people this may be coming from a privileged standpoint. Some people are may just like, look, I gotta take the job that I can get because, you know, I'm struggling financially. And so I, I am coming from a privileged perspective when I do say that. But as best as you can, I say set yourself up to succeed, don't set yourself up for failure, because if I say chose a job working at a bar, I, it would be rough. Like, I don't know how I would be able to do that. So definitely try to set yourself up for success on that.

Damon Frank (12:39):
I love this. This is such a great topic. Gabri, thank you so much for coming on the show today. I really appreciate and thank you for all of your insight.

Gabri Augello (12:47):
Thank you for having me

Announcer (12:49):
Keep the conversation going. Join recovered life. A community of like-minded people who are looking to live their best-recovered lives. Membership is free, and you can apply at members.recoveredlife.us And they've either gone through this or they're about ready to go through it, right. That transition into the workplace. How is it different?